My Moon, Chapter 19.1 pg 4
My Moon, Chapter 19.1 pg 4
“Got it.”
Panli stood up from the chair after his friend left the classroom. Panli’s black phone, buzzing with messages from several campus beauties, made him sigh. Panli slipped it into his back pocket. Boss, Panli’s close friend from another faculty, had gotten drunk and shared Panli’s LINE ID in a drinking circle with a bunch of girls. That’s why so many were messaging Panli, making him want to delete his LINE account altogether.
Today, Panli came to class alone since his close friends were all conveniently “sick.” Panli could believe Chubby Cheeks was actually ill, but Joy and Type were probably “sick” with political fever. Still, Panli wasn’t mad even if they were lying. Panli had skipped class plenty of times and had them take notes for him. This time, Panli was just returning the favor.
Panli grabbed his silver pen and tucked it into his shirt pocket, then rolled up the paper with the assignment details he’d jotted down. Once everything was packed, Panli strode out of the classroom.
Panli’s original plan after class was to head to Nay’s condo since there was a live football match tonight. Nay said a bunch of friends were watching at his place. Watching alone at home wouldn’t be fun, and dragging Panli’s nanny—who loves evening soaps—to watch football would just be torture for her.
But something Panli’s not-so-close classmate said changed his plans. Instead of heading out, Panli stepped out of the elevator and made a beeline for the exhibition hall. Ever since Panli submitted his photo for the joint photography exhibition between the Faculty of Communication Arts and Digital Media, Panli hadn’t once gone to see his own work.
“Phii Ball said tons of girls went to check out ‘Lost in the Moon’s Shadow.’”
The swarm of girls wasn’t why Panli decided to check out his photo. Only one woman made Panli choose to see his work—someone Panli hadn’t even planned to visit because Panli wanted to avoid the girls who’d ask him to explain the photo’s meaning, only to follow up by asking for Panli’s LINE ID to “learn photography.” Panli could predict how those interactions would go and was fed up with them. That’s why he had avoided seeing his own work altogether.
The woman who made him want to come see the photo “Lost in the Moon’s Shadow” and take a picture to send to her is “Mama,” the one who gave him my real name, “Sasin,” which means “moon.” She’s the one who inspired him to drive to the sea to capture a photo that fit the concept, with his essence in it. She’s also the one who helped him name this photo “Lost in the Moon’s Shadow.”
Mama told me that “Lost in the Moon’s Shadow” means, “Sometimes, the moon’s reflection might make it seem like there’s another moon on Earth, but in truth, there’s only one moon. And no matter how many people mistakenly think the reflection is another moon, nothing can change the fact that there’s only one.”
It’s kind of like…
Sometimes, something or someone might make us lose sight of who we are along the way.
But in the end, nothing and no one can change our true self.
At this late hour, Panli figured no one would come to see the photos in the exhibition anymore, as the university staff would soon come to lock the doors. And Panli was right—while he walked inside, Panli didn’t see or hear anyone.
But then, a guy who Panli guessed was an aviation business student, judging by his distinctive navy suit, made Panli pause his steps. Panli stopped a fair distance away from him. Even from that distance, Panli could clearly see the side of his face. The guy was smiling gently as he looked at “Lost in the Moon’s Shadow.” This small-framed guy gave Panli’s photo a thumb-up, as if to say, “Great job,” the way Panli’s dad used to praise him when he was a kid for swallowing bitter medicine without fussing.
Panli furrowed his brow, lost in thought as he secretly watched the guy, before realizing he was Phii Dom’s cousin, in the same year as Panli. Phii Fah had pointed him out to Panli a few weeks ago. Panli isn’t sure if it was because the guy gave a thumbs-up to “Lost in the Moon’s Shadow” or because he’s a relative of Panli’s close senior that made Panli want to go introduce himself. Whatever the reason, it made Panli start walking again.
Buzz—
But a vibrating notification stopped Panli in his tracks. When Panli pulled out his phone, he saw it was an important call he couldn’t ignore. Panli glanced at the name “Mom” on the glass screen, then back at the sweet-faced guy who wouldn’t take his eyes off Panli’s photo. Panli decided to step outside to take the call. He walked out to the area near the bathroom before answering Mama’s call.
“Yes, Mama?”
[“Sweetie, when are you going to take a picture for me to see?”]
“I was just about to take one for you, but you called first.”
[“Oh, did I interrupt you?”]
“…”
[“I’m sorry, sweetie.”]
“It’s okay, Mama.”
[“Once you’re done, send it to me, okay? I’ve already seen the full photo files, but I still want to see how it looks displayed at the exhibition.”]
“Alright, Ma, I’ll send you the photos once I’m done shooting.”
[Okay, son. I miss you.]
“I miss you too, Ma.”
As soon as Panli hung up with Mom, he hurried back to the exhibition room, hoping that the guy was still there, admiring Panli’s photos. But the wide room, now filled only with lifeless photographs, made Panli slow his steps and let out a soft sigh.
It’s rare to meet someone Panli really wants to get to know.
Not exactly regret…
But honestly?
Yeah, Panli does regret not getting to talk to him.
Panli quickly snapped some photos and sent them to his Mom before leaving the room, hoping he’d get the chance to meet the guy someday…
A white cigarette touched Panli’s lips as he thought back to that day he first saw the guy. Even though days had passed and Panli hadn’t seen him again, Panli couldn’t shake the urge to get to know him.
After that day, Panli secretly lingered at the exhibition room several times, thinking the guy might come back to look at his photos again. But Panli forgot that kind of thing only happens in novels. In reality… the guy never returned to see his work.
Panli thought about asking Phii Dom what his younger brother’s name was, and Panli even wanted to be upfront and say, Panli really wants to get to know him. But those thoughts were folded away and locked tight in a drawer because Panli figured Phii Dom might get suspicious of him.
Phii Dom’s younger brother isn’t just a little cute.
Even though Phii Dom knows Panli isn’t the playboy people make him out to be, trust Panli—nine times out of ten, Phii Dom would still be wary.
If Panli said, “I just want to get to know him, not hit on him,” a ton of questions would probably pop into Phii Dom’s head. And if he added, “Don’t worry, I won’t break your brother’s heart,” it’d make things even worse. That’d sound like Panli was seriously pursuing Phii Dom’s brother.
When in reality, Panli just wants to get to know him, that’s all. Getting to know him isn’t easy, and dealing with these feelings is insanely tough…
This urge to know him is driving Panli crazy.
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