Pitbabe S2, Chapter 18 pg1

 Pitbabe S2, Chapter 18 pg1

   Chapter 18:

   CHARLIE

   Several minutes had passed without anyone saying a word, the front door still open. I stood inside the house. Babe stood outside, just an arm’s length away. He was wearing a white T-shirt and gray shorts, his usual sleepwear. Someone as image-conscious as Pitbabe would never step out looking like this, no matter the time of day. But today, it was as if he rolled out of bed, slipped on the nearest pair of flip-flops by the door, and drove his fancy car to see his ex in the middle of the night.

   If it wasn’t something urgent, maybe he really heard the chaos in my head.

   “I didn’t even ask where you moved to. Out of nowhere, Alan just told me,” Babe finally spoke, his voice soft, his eyes looking somewhere else instead of at my face.

   “Okay.”

   “For real.”

   “Okay.” I wasn’t trying to be annoying, but because I kept replying with just “okay,” the guy who’d been avoiding my gaze finally flicked his eyes back to meet mine, his face clearly irritated, probably thinking I was messing with him.

   “You think I’m lying?”

   “I don’t think you is lying.”

   “Then why do you keep saying ‘okay’ like that?”

   “Because I believe you,” I said flatly, staring at his face, deliberately studying him. Babe didn’t look noticeably worn out. He was a bit thinner, but not drastically so. His skin was still radiant, his cheeks slightly flushed like the color of his lips. He didn’t seem like the type to let himself go after a breakup. Honestly, I thought Babe looked even more beautiful. Maybe this was the glow of being single? “I know you isn’t lying.”

   “You better. You can catch lies anyway. At least make use of it sometimes.”

   “you know I don’t use that sense on you.”

   “Maybe you should sometimes.”

   “No need for this,” I replied. “I told Phii Alan myself to let Babe know.”

   I once told Babe that he looked like the orange cat from Puss in Boots, especially when he was curious or surprised. His brows would furrow, his eyes would widen, and his lips would purse into a tiny pout, like a cat’s mouth. I thought it was cute, and I still do. But saying that out loud right now probably wouldn’t be appropriate.

   “Why’d you tell him?”

   “In case there’s something urgent.”

   “We’re broken up, and you’re still worried about something urgent?”

   “Just in case there’s a day I want to come find you late at night, or super late, you know?” I answered honestly. Ever since I knew I’d be moving out of the lab, I’d already decided I’d have to tell Babe my new address. Sure, we might be done, but no one knows what the future holds. If something urgent comes up, I want him to know where to find me. Not just for Babe’s peace of mind, but for my own too. “Like now… isn’t it pretty convenient?”

   “So you’re saying I can come find you whenever I want?”

   “Yup.”

   Babe went quiet. He looked like he wanted to chew me out a bit, but probably couldn’t think of a good reason to. So he just gave me an annoyed cat face before barging into the house without waiting for me, the homeowner, to invite him in. I thought, well, this makes things easier.

   “Haven’t unpacked yet?” Babe’s eyes scanned the place, suddenly acting like he was here to tour my new house.

   “Just finished moving stuff this evening. Haven’t had time to unpack,” I said.

   “Nice house.” My late-night guest wandered around, from the living room to the kitchen. Good thing he didn’t barge into my bedroom. “Good location too. Phii Alan really knows how to pick these things.”

   “How’d you know Phii Alan found it for me?”

   “I know everything.”

   Babe seemed to be making a point that he’s not the only one whose business I keep tabs on—he’s been keeping an eye on me too. If we’re being logical, it’s like we’re both still meddling in each other’s lives, even though we keep saying we’re done. I’d say we’re even on that front, so neither of us dares to call the other out first.

   “But isn’t it a bit… big for a single guy?” Babe glanced at me, pretending to be casual, but it was pretty obvious he was probing with that “single guy” comment.

   “I think it’s about the same size as your place,” I said, looking around my new house, answering straightforwardly as if I didn’t catch the hidden meaning in his question.

   “I’ve always liked going big. A big house isn’t weird for me.”

   “I just bought big to be safe.”

   “For what?” Babe probably didn’t realize he’d raised his voice at me, his eyes openly irritated, his vibe exactly like when he used to yank my chain. “For bringing someone to live with you or what?”

   “Could be. Who knows what the future holds?”

   “Far-sighted, aren’t you?”

   My late-night guest threw out some sarcasm, then turned away, pretending to be super interested in my new house. But I knew he was probably wrestling with himself, wondering whether to grill me or figure out how to get back at me for stirring up his feelings without reason. I’ll admit, seeing Babe’s jealous side made me feel good. Whether it’s real jealousy or just possessiveness, I couldn’t help but be pleased that he still has some attachment to me. No matter how much of a jerk I’ve been to him.

   “Something on your mind, Babe?”

   Though I was happy to see him, I was still sensible enough to know this wasn’t something we should act like we could do casually, meeting up without a reason. Of course, it felt forced, but who doesn’t have to force themselves sometimes? Who gets everything they want? I’m no different. Not exceptional, not better than anyone else. I, too, have things I want but can’t touch.

   “There’s a reason,” Babe replied flatly. He walked back to the middle of the living room, stopping three or four steps away, staring at me with a serious gaze, completely different from the playful, cat-like Babe from moments ago. “Why would I come if there wasn’t?”

   “Maybe because you missed me?”

   “Don’t get carried away.”

   His sharp retort stung, but this felt more like the real Pitbabe.

   “I thought you’d have seen the news by now, and that photo too,” Babe cut straight to the point.

   “Yes, I’ve seen it.”

   “And you don’t want to ask me anything?”

   “What does you want me to ask?”

   A psychological standoff erupted out of nowhere. Babe seemed to have an answer for everything, his eyes brimming with unwavering confidence. Yet, at the same time, I saw a smoldering anger in them, probably because he thought it was unfair that I believed everything I saw without even asking him for the truth. Or maybe he was mad that I acted like I didn’t care about his business anymore.

   “Don’t you want to know if what they’re saying is true? Don’t you want to know where that photo came from?” Babe asked, his voice hard. “Or do you think I cheated on you too?”

   “I don’t know, Babe.”

   “If you don’t know, then ask.”

   “What’s the point of asking?”

   “So you can know the truth,” Babe’s tone suddenly turned icy, as if he were freezing the living room, trapping me and punishing me with a bone-chilling cold that pierced my heart. “Instead of just believing what you assume.”

   “I’m not assuming anything.”

   “Don’t lie.”

   “I’m not lying.”

   “I said, don’t lie!” Babe stepped closer, his piercing gaze cutting into me, making me feel a burning pain as if he were physically striking me.

   “Babe,” I averted my eyes, because his stare made me feel like I was being cornered with no escape. “I don’t know what you want me to think.”

   “If you really aren’t thinking anything, then look at me.”

   I couldn’t. All I could bring myself to look at were the boxes lined up against the wall, the trees outside the window, the old floor lamp, and the tips of my own shoes.

   Anything but Babe.

   “Look,” Babe orders, his voice harsh, holding back a massive wave of emotions I don’t want to face, “Charlie.”

   “Babe, I…”

   “Look me in the face and say clearly that you don’t feel anything at all seeing me kiss someone else.”

   No matter how hard I try to escape, I can’t beat Babe in the end. I drag my gaze slowly to his face, swallowing hard. In moments like this, no matter how much I want to lie, my body won’t obey me anymore. Only the person in front of me can give orders. Even if I managed to lie, Babe would catch it in seconds. He doesn’t even need the special intuition I have.

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