Pitbabe S2, Chapter 23 pg 3

 Pitbabe S2, Chapter 23 pg 3

   Jeff still needs to recover for at least three or four more days. I wanted to stay and watch over him for a night, but that kid insisted that the duty should fall to Phii Alan. After we talked it out, Jeff ordered me to call Phii Alan, and as soon as his boyfriend arrived, he practically kicked me out. I can’t believe the bond between brothers can be this fragile.

   I walked to the parking lot while replying to messages from Dr. Chris. He, Liu, and Phii Touch wanted to visit Jeff even before he was out of the emergency room, but I stopped them since there were already enough people here. Once Jeff woke up, he told me, “Tell the lab folks they don’t need to come rushing over. I’m not dead yet.” Now Dr. Chris was sending me an essay about my and my brother’s pathetic people skills, even though we just didn’t want to make a fuss for no reason.

   I froze when I reached the spot where I remembered parking my car. I recalled that my car and Babe’s were parked side by side, and in my mind, I expected Babe’s car to be gone by the time I came out. But the scene in front of me made it pretty clear that no matter what I hoped for, God wasn’t going to grant it easily. Naturally.

   I stopped next to his car, by the driver’s side door, staring at the famous racer who had put down the convertible top of his fancy car and was lying there under the night dew at a time like this. He should’ve driven home after I spat those harsh words at him. I thought Babe would’ve been mad enough to leave, but here he was, sprawled in his car like he was waiting for me or something.

   “Babe,” I called softly, but the sleeping figure didn’t show any sign of stirring. It didn’t seem like he was just resting his eyes—he was out cold, seriously asleep. “Babe.”

   I called again, this time reaching out to shake him lightly. Luckily, a gentle shake was enough to jolt the sleepyhead awake, because otherwise, I might’ve had to drag him back to the doctor.

   “What are you doing sleeping out here?” I asked as he still looked groggy. Babe stared at me with those drowsy, cat-like eyes, like he’d briefly forgotten we’d just had a fight. He moved as if he wanted to act clingy, like he always did when he woke up, but in a split second, he remembered that kind of behavior had been off-limits for a while now. “Why not go home and sleep properly?”

   “I was sleepy,” Babe replied curtly, looking away as if slightly embarrassed that he’d almost slipped back into old habits from when we were together. For a moment, I wondered if he’d been dreaming about me, but that’s not something to ask right now. I’ll let his dreams stay his private space. “You want me to drive while I’m sleepy?”

   “Well, that’s good then,” I said. “I thought maybe you were lying here waiting for me.”

   “Waiting for what? For you to come yell at me again?”

   “I wasn’t yelling.”

   “Oh! So I just misunderstood, huh?” I knew he didn’t find it funny at all, but his sarcastic tone and exaggerated expression made me accidentally let out a laugh. When Babe acts like this, he’s so cute that I can’t help but want to chuckle every time he throws sarcasm my way. “Well, sorry then. My bad for thinking you were chewing me out in front of everyone. If I’d known you weren’t yelling, I wouldn’t have to sit here feeling embarrassed and awful.”

   Oh… no, this isn’t the time to be thinking he’s cute.

   “Babe… I’m sorry,” I tried to meet his eyes, but he kept turning his face away. “I was really stressed about Jeff back then and didn’t think it through. I shouldn’t have said those things to you in front of others. I’m sorry.”

   Suddenly, it’s like we’re back to square one. We’ve been broken up for a while, but neither of us seems used to this new status. We keep having to remind ourselves we can’t act the way we used to. Yet here I am, standing in the same old spot, apologizing to him, staring at that familiar, beautiful face, and waiting for his forgiveness. Even though I know that, even if Babe forgives me, the ending won’t be the same. We won’t drive home in the same car, live in the same house, or sleep in the same bed like we once did.

   “I’ll be more careful from now on,” I said, leaning down, bracing my arm on the car door, and mustering the courage to take his hand. I was surprised when Babe didn’t pull away. He sat still, letting me hold his hand, though he still wouldn’t look at me. “Or do you want to yell at me? I can go get everyone to watch.”

   “Don’t be ridiculous, Charlie,” Babe muttered. “Why would I do that?”

   “So we can clear the air. I lashed out in front of others, so you can call me out in front of them too. That way, I’ll know how it feels.”

   “You wouldn’t know unless you felt it yourself?”

   “I know, but I’m worried a simple apology won’t be enough.” I brushed my thumb over the back of his hand, nearly giving in to the urge to kiss it several times but managing to hold myself back. “I yelled at Babe in front of others, but then I come to apologize in private like this. Doesn’t that seem unfair?”

   Babe went quiet for a moment before letting out a long sigh.

   “Forget it.”

   “?”

   “Forget it,” he said firmly, finally turning to meet my eyes. “I’ve already chewed you out in front of people plenty.”

   I couldn’t help but laugh. I hadn’t thought of it at first, but when Babe brought it up, I realized that if we were keeping score, he’d torn into me in front of others countless times—especially early in our relationship. If we were to offset those against my mistakes, I could probably go two lifetimes without needing to apologize again.

   “Good thing you remember,” I said.

   “I’ll let it slide, but I’m not letting you win.”

   “Babe, you don’t get to stop me.”

   “Hey! You’re saying that again!”

Previous

Next