Pitbabes2, Chapter 3 pg4

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   In the end, I lost. I couldn’t hold back my laughter—Babe’s soft whisper, like he was scared a louder voice might actually make me mad, was too much.

   “What’s so funny?” Babe looked puzzled, then furrowed his brows, scowling when he realized I’d been teasing him. “Playing me, huh, four-eyes?”

   “Why’re you so cute?” I couldn’t resist showering his cheeks with kisses. Honestly, I wanted to squish Babe into a ball and swallow him whole, but that’d be a bit too cruel. So I settled for letting out my playful urges with a fierce hug and some aggressive nuzzling.

   “Ow… stop it!”

   “So cute, cute, cute!”

   “Charlie, you—!”

   “Pick one: wait for me to shower, or come in with me.”

   Babe’s eyes widened at my question. He looked deep in thought, as if this decision would change our lives forever.

   “With you.”

   His answer wasn’t surprising. I knew he’s impatient—Babe has always hated waiting.

   “Come on.”

   I led him by the hand to the bathroom, giving in to his every whim, no matter how mischievous he got. I get excited every time we try something new together, and I can’t deny that Babe’s “new things” never disappoint.

   

   JEFF:

   This place is always peaceful whenever I visit. A gentle breeze blows, ripples dance on the water’s surface, and branches and grass sway lightly. It’s never scorching hot—just bright sun or soft light, depending on the sun’s schedule. The atmosphere hovers between calm and melancholic. The first part is obviously due to the setting, but the latter might stem from the memories buried here.

   “You can go in first,” I said after opening the car door. Phii Alan was busy grabbing stuff from the trunk. He looked up at me with a strange expression when I suggested he head in ahead. “Jeff’s waiting for Charlie first. Go find the others, Phii. Almost everyone’s here, right?”

   “But we can go in together. Charlie can catch up with Babe later,” he said. It wasn’t a big deal, but it made Phii Alan frown. Maybe because I was acting off. He’s always been observant about stuff like this, even if he’s cluelessly annoying about other things. “Something up?”

   Phii Alan set down the items he’d picked up from the car back in their place. He walked around the car toward me, asking with a worried expression. I’m starting to think I need to get better at hiding these pointless feelings.

   “No, Phii Alan, I just…” I tried to come up with a reasonable excuse for my odd behavior, but Phii Alan’s concerned look made it impossible to lie to him. Maybe this is his secret weapon, designed just for me. “Okay, but if I tells you, you can’t overthink it.”

   “Can that be helped?”

   “Phii Alan.”

   “Alright, I’ll try,” Phii Alan said with a serious face, which looked kind of funny, though now wasn’t the time to laugh. “What’s wrong?”

   I hesitated a bit about bringing this up. It’s one of those things that’s hard to understand, sensitive, and could easily lead to an unnecessary fight. But Phii Alan’s expectant expression made me feel like I should say it. Since I promised to communicate more, this could be part of that practice.

   “I know you and Phii Way were close, that you went through a lot together. When he died, I was sad too. But the way everyone acts like he did nothing wrong… it makes me uncomfortable.” I said it, damn it. I couldn’t even look Phii Alan in the eye. I had no idea what kind of expression he had right now. “Sorry.”

   “No, no, you don’t need to apologize.” Phii Alan’s calm demeanor eased my mind a lot. He wasn’t angry or looking at me with disappointment, just a little confused. “It’s not wrong for you to feel however you feel. But you understand that I have my own feelings too, right?”

   “I understand. That’s why I come with you to see him every time, even feeling like this.” Something was welling up in my chest. I tried to hold it back. I decided I’d only let a little of it out, because this isn’t about dumping my feelings on Phii Alan and forcing him to agree. “I know Phii Way was family to you, but not to me. We weren’t close. He didn’t trust me, and I didn’t trust him from the start. He did a lot of things I can’t accept, things that, if he’d succeeded, some of us might not be standing here. Maybe I, maybe Charlie, Phii Babe, or even you.”

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