My Moon, Chapter 3 pg 11
My Moon, Chapter 3 pg 11
KantHimself: Klai, you done with your exam?
KantHimself: Phii Shin is waiting for you at the library, same table as usual. Not many people there now.
glaijai: Done, I’m on my way.
KantHimself: Okay, hurry up, come on.
glaijai: Yeah.
Klai quickly puts his phone in his back pocket after sending the last message to Kant. Today, he’s determined to confess his love to Phii Shin. Klai planned to invite him to the library in the evening, claiming he had a question about a problem from Phii Shin’s exam review sheet, but in truth, Klai already understood everything.
As for Kant, who doesn’t have an exam today, he came to the university to support him. Kant said he’d watch from a distance because he wanted Klai and Phii Shin to talk privately. He’d only show up after Klai confessed. Klai smiles as his close friend’s words echo in his mind.
“When it works out, Klaijai... please ask Phii Shin to take care of my best friend.”
Kant said he’d say this after the confession. Klai shakes his head slightly, smiling even wider. He quickens his pace to reach the library as fast as possible.
At the library, he sees Kant hiding by a bookshelf in a corner, far from the window-side table where Phii Shin is waiting. Kant nods and gives him a two-finger salute. Klai smiles back before walking toward Phii Shin.
Today seems like a perfect day for a confession. Besides the three of them and the librarian, there’s no one else in the library.
Probably because Phii Shin is engrossed in his book, he doesn’t notice Klai’s arrival. Klai quietly pulls out the empty chair across from him and sits down.
“Hey... you’re here?”
“Yes, have you been waiting long, Phii Shin?”
“Not long. I was reading, and it’s kinda fun, you know.”
“…”
“So, which problem is you confused about?”
Klai swallows hard before reaching into his backpack to pull out a piece of paper—not Phii Shin’s review sheet. He looks at the words he wrote by hand on the white paper.
The text on the paper reads…
The problem goes like this… If Klai were to say that he’s secretly loved Phii Shin for a long time, ever since they were in the basketball club, Klai tried several times to get to know Phii Shin, but never succeeded. Not once did Phii Shin remember Klai. Until one day, Phii Shin approached Klai to get to know him. At that moment, Klai was overjoyed, and we grew closer day by day. Phii Shin didn’t just create good memories for Klai alone; he made something grow stronger every single day… That something was “love.”
Klai took a deep breath before handing the paper in his hand to the other person. Phii Shin frowned slightly and took it. Klai watched him read the text on the paper intently. After a brief moment, Phii Shin looked up and met his gaze. Klai stared deeply into those sharp eyes before speaking to complete the unfinished problem on the paper.
“The result of this problem… I wonder… Is it possible that you feel the same way as me?”
His hands began to tremble as the confused and uncertain look in Phii Shin’s eyes returned, like a vivid memory from the past flashing before him. Klai swallowed hard and pressed his lips together tightly. He had prepared himself somewhat, in case their hearts weren’t aligned.
And now…
If the result is… that our feelings are not aligned,
Another truth in this world is… the phrase “prepare your heart” doesn’t really exist.
And there’s another truth: Klai would probably be in a lot of pain.
Klai…
“Yes, Phii Shin?”
“I don’t know where to begin,” Phii Shin said before sighing. It was the first time Klai had seen him look so troubled. That handsome face looked up to meet his eyes before continuing, “I don’t feel that way about you, Klai.”
…
“I only think of you as a younger brother.”
“…”
“I’m sorry… if I did anything to make you think I acted out of liking him.”
Klai thought the sentence, “I don’t feel that way about you, Klai,” was painful enough. But hearing this sentence, why did it hurt even more?
“I really can’t think of you in that way.” The confused and uncertain look in Phii Shin’s eyes now turned steady and resolute. He bit his lip before saying, “Can you stop loving me like this?”
The truth is… pain has no end. We can keep hurting, over and over, until our heart feels completely numb.
Soon, the steady and resolute look in his eyes turned empty and indifferent. “I’ve never asked you for anything. But this time, I’m asking… Please stop loving me like this.”
Klai admitted that he started losing track of Phii Shin’s words from the sentence, “Can you stop loving me like this?” But he forced himself to keep listening to what Phii Shin said next, even struggling to understand what was being asked of him. Klai closed his eyes and took a deep breath, just like when he handed that piece of paper to Phii Shin. He was about to open his eyes, but a stinging sensation in his nose warned him to pull himself together before meeting Phii Shin’s gaze again.
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